25ish

This morning, a good friend of mine passed along an article that dictated “11 Things You Should Know at 25ish.” It was an interesting and inspiring article, though I think it was a bit more God-fearing than the general public might appreciate. But regardless, it got me thinking about who I am at 25ish. The final section of the article reminded us to not get stuck. The author says that it’s easy to fly by the seat of our pants in our 20s and not take the opportunity to learn and grow. Some people spend this decade holding on to college or partying and drinking like our 30s aren’t right around the corner. Some people get lost it the corporate ladder and live life too seriously considering our 30s are indeed right around the corner. I think I probably fit more into the second option. I’ve devoted a good portion of my early 20s to work, and while that’s been successful in some senses, it’s taken me away from my family and M. It’s caused me to miss a lot of happy hours, dinners and gym sessions because I’m still sitting at my desk at 8 p.m. The author says that our 20s are not about either one of these lifestyles. Our 20s are about becoming.

“Becoming” can mean a lot of different things. The author offers several questions that we should ask ourselves when we’re figuring out who we are:

1. Am I proud of the life I’m living?
2. What have I tried this month?
3. What have I learned about God this year?
4. What parts of my childhood faith am I leaving behind, and what parts am I choosing to keep?
5. Do the people I’m spending time with give me life, or make me feel small?
6. Is there any brokenness in my life that’s keeping me from moving forward?

Wow. This is a lot to think about.

Two of these questions jumped out at me. What have I tried this month? In college, it feels like we’re always growing. There are a lot of firsts. First college classes, first time living alone, first fraternity party, first internship, first job offer. Once we’re out of college, the firsts slow down. We settle into a routine that might not require us to take personal risks as much as we did before. Sure, there are plenty of things I’ve done for the first time this year. I moved to a new city; I took responsibility for a portfolio of clients at work; I traveled to New Orleans, Boston and the Dominican for the first time; I made new friends; I started volunteering. But there are certainly things I could do in my daily life to make my experiences more complete, and that’s something I’m going to strive for in 2012.

The second question that got me thinking was about the people I’m spending my life with. Until I read the way the author phrased that question, I wasn’t able to articulate how I was feeling. Some people really do make me feel small. Some friends (and some of my good friends for a matter of fact) have a way of making me feel like I am less. Some people always need to be right. Some people are pulling a dark cloud behind them that they let rain all over other people. Some people only share their burdens and don’t try to ease the burdens of their friends. All of these things make me feel tired, exhausted and small. But on the other hand, I have friends who have a way of infecting those around them with their joy. I have friends who are always lifting me up, even without intending to. I have friends who inspire me and make me think. I have friends who make me smarter and more thoughtful when I’m with them. These are the people I need to surround myself with, and this is the type of person I need to strive to become.

So those are my thoughts for today. Here’s the link to the article in case any of you are interested in reading: http://m.relevantmagazine.com/life/whole-life/features/25956-11-things-to-know-at-25ish?start=1

To becoming our twenties,

Lia